• A Pregnant Klutz and Her Accident

    Date: 2009.07.17 | Category: Bunky, London, Pregnancy, Punky, Spunky, mama | Tags:

    This is a long, and true, story.

    One of my first thoughts when arriving in the London and walking across her old, stone roads, was that I must not trip.  I have been very cautious on stairs and when crossing the street.  But I must have become too relaxed by Wednesday.

    I was walking down the sidewalk from our hotel towards the tube (subway).  It is a distance that I travel several times a day.  However, on this very day, I managed to catch my shoe on the curb and I tripped on landed straight on my stomach.  I tried to grab hold of something, anything, but there was nothing nearby.

    Several people immediately came to my aide and called an ambulance.  Not only was I terrified, more terrified than I have ever been in my entire life, but I was alone and without a way to contact my husband who I was on my way to meet.

    A very kind lady held my hand while I waited for the ambulance and feared the absolute worst.  My little boy was not moving and had hidden himself way towards my back, which made my abdomen feel very soft, not its usual hard self.  I was shaking with fear.

    The ambulance arrived and the EMS men checked me out.  I was fine except for a terribly bruised knee.  They were unable to find a heartbeat with the stethoscope; so they recommended that I head to the hospital to be checked out.  Since the baby wasn’t moving at all, despite my poking him constantly, we decided to try to find my husband via ambulance and then go to the ER.

    I was to meet my husband at Westminster Cathedral for the 5:30pm service.  We waited in the courtyard in front of the church for about 20 minutes, during which time, my precious boy began to move and sneak out of his corner.  I was so relieved I almost began to cry.

    My husband never showed up.  It turns out that his train was stuck underground and a trip that should have taken 10-15 minutes took 45.  He arrived at the church to find me absent and immediately started calling the hotel.  Fortunately, a passerby at the time of my accident had gone to the hotel with information about where I was going, as did the Police a little while later.

    All this time, I was at the hospital being checked by a doctor.  Everything was fine.  The baby’s heartrate was steady and strong, and my BP was in good range.  I was sent home with advice to come back if anything changed.  Besides being incredibly sore in my abdomen, nothing has changed.

    At this point, I was alone in a strange area of London without any way to contact my husband who was terrified that something horrible had happened to his wife and child.  All he knew was that I had had an accident and had been taken to the hospital.

    He arrived at the hospital only to find that they had no record of me in the ER (I had gone straight to the OB).  Just as I was about to give up hope of finding him, I went to the ER for a second time and there he was on the phone with our hotel.  We reunited, and I told him that that baby and I are fine.  Slowly, during the evening, I relayed parts of the story as I could remember them.  I was still very shaken up and on the verge of tears much of the night.

    We enjoyed a lovely French dinner, during which I had a tiny glass of wine, advised by the doctor for my nerves.  Then we came back to the hotel.  The following day was actually the hardest for me.  I think I had been so strong that previous evening that I hadn’t had a chance to deal with my emotions.  All the time that the baby was not moving, I could only think that I had killed him.  Terrible, terrible thoughts passed through my mind.  Every time I feel him move, which he does very often, I am reminded that we could have lost him.  But God protected my beautiful child, and for that I am beyond thankful.

    I cannot imagine the pain that a mother feels when she loses a child. The pain that I felt imagining that it could be happening to me was beyond any type of grief I have felt before.  Then hearing his heartbeat brought me greater relief that I have ever known.  My precious child is safe and growing stronger each moment.  I have been taking slow and steady steps where ever I go.  But, to be honest, I am quite terrified of tripping again.  It feels like what I have heard happens after you are in a car accident and are afraid to get behind the wheel again.  That is how I felt yesterday.  I was afraid that I would venture out alone and trip again.

    Times like this make me miss my children even more.  That night, we were able to call my family and talk to both of the kids.  It was so comforting to her them say “I love you”, even if Spunky called me “papa” at first instead of “mommy.”  And Punky’s “see ya soon” brought a huge smile to my face.

    We have a busy few days ahead of us and then we head back home.  I look forward to sharing this time with my husband, but I am also anticipating hugging my little ones again.